Drunken Pumpkin

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy.

Jeff used the power of the internet to prove Einstein’s theory of the difference between genius and stupidity. And of course McDonalds came up pretty high on the list.

Prior to his engagement as a wage slave in a cubicle dungeon Jeff worked at the grill in a McDonalds. He considered it moving into a different circle of hell, one with air-conditioning instead of a 400 degree piece of metal. It was Jeff’s idea that in order to maintain a constant pace of serving people every 60 seconds it would be faster if some of the people were just booted out of line and considered served, even though they hadn’t been. Hence, the onset of drive-thru parking. I have to say, that it was one of the more insidious of Jeff’s ideas. After all, once they’ve payed for their food no one is going to just wander off, and if they went through the drive-thru they are probably a little loath to get out of their car, now. So, if you put them out of the way, your service problems are now sitting outside of your building and out of your queue.

When faced with a man holding a slender piece of metal, I think it only sensible to have a bigger piece of metal between the two of you. And if you can get them off of the ground with a similar slender piece of metal, all the better. Of course, the real danger I think Jeff was presenting was, why on earth would you get into a fight with someone, just because? Where’s the motivation to be good? I think they should have some real fencing at the Olympics next time. None of those masks and chest protectors. Just two guys with sharp pieces of metal trying to hurt one another. And then I think that claymore might just come in handy.

Tune in tomorrow for more of Jeff’s worldly wisdom.