Drunken Pumpkin

Obi-Wan Kenobi would invariably be referred to as ‘Chief’ or ‘Big Yin’ by his cohorts. People trying to start a fight with him would addess him as ‘Wanky-Nobby’.

Darth Vader would referred to as ‘Auld Helmet Heid’ or in moments of stress ‘That Dome-Heided Basturd’

Although proficient in over 3500 languages C3P0 would still be unable to understand anything anyone from the East End of Glasgow said. He would regularly get beaten up for being a ‘greetin-faced poof fae Milngavie’.

Read the full article (it’s worth the read) here

Light travels faster than sound, which is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

Here’s a little tale about a small town in Indiana.

Look for more input from Scratch in the near future.

I really love that one of the solutions to the war on terror is to spend more money. Yeah, that’ll show them heathens.

Speaking of spending more money, don’t forget to swing by Overstock.com and buy copious amounts of stuff for your sweethart for Valentine’s Day.

Jeff must have taken my suggestion about civic duty to heart in his trip around the internet seriously yesterday. Although it does seem that he could only find those things that involved stopping it as opposed to taking part.

I think Jeff is beginning to show his distrust for authority, and previously he has been so clever at concealing it. Okay, maybe not. But I think Jeff may have been a major contributor to that list that DeNiro was reading. Sometimes his wit is not particularly subtle in it’s execution. And sometimes you just need some dick and fart jokes to make the world a more bearable place.

Tune in tomorrow when we try to make it to Digg with a top 5 list. I’m still not sure what that list might be, but I have it on good authority that that is how you raise your numbers.