Drunken Pumpkin

• Comics

  Comics pages by Pyrophage

  (tags: Art blog)

5. “They told me at the Blood Bank this might happen.”

4. “This is just the 15 minute power nap they raved about in the time management course you sent me to.”

3. “Whew! Guess I left the top off the Whiteout. You probably got here just in time.”

2. “Did you ever notice sounds coming out of these keyboards when you put your ear down real close?”

1. Raise your head slowly and say, “…in Jesus’ name, Amen.”

For a couple years I’ve been blaming it on lack of sleep, not enough sunshine, too much pressure from my job , earwax buildup, poor blood , or anything else I could think of. But now I found out the real reason:
I’m tired because I’m overworked.
Here’s why:

The population of this country is 273 million.
140 million are retired.
That leaves 133 million to do the work.
There are 85 million in school.
Which leaves 48 million to do the work.
Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government.
Leaving 19 million to do the work.
2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing Osama Bin-Laden.
Which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.
Take from that total the 14.8 million people who work for state and city governments.
And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.
At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals.
Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.
Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.
That leaves just two people to do the work.
You and me.

And there you are, sitting there at your computer reading jokes.

Nice.

Real nice.

Lord help my poor soul.

writer, d. October 7, 1849