Drunken Pumpkin

I die hard but am not afraid to go.

Died December 14, 1799

DailyTech.com

The headline reads:

NIST Creates Perpetual Motion … But Only for 10 Seconds

Codeine . . . bourbon.

Died December 12, 1968

I’ve never felt better.

Died December 12, 1939

A letter from Mr. Pratchett containing the revelation can be found here.

Terry Pratchett is a British best-selling author, best known for his Discworld series of novels, as well has having won numerous awards for children’s books.

Yeah, it’s been a while, but a promise is a promise.

I may have been a little hasty when saying that the movie business seemed to forget that Will Smith isn’t white. I can only come up with a couple movies where he’s clearly played what is traditionally a white character: Wild Wild West and I Am Legend.

Jim West was a white guy. Originally West was played by Robert Conrad on the TV Show (now available on DVD, I might add), and compounded by the fact that West was supposed to be the first member of the US Secret Service, he should have been white, if for no other reason than continuity. On the other hand, how can you cite a film for an anachronism when it has a giant mechanical spider in it? Seriously, that’s a little like complaining that Bugs Bunny doesn’t run the way a rabbit should, while ignoring the fact that he talks.

Then we have the forthcoming I Am Legend. Again, the character of Robert Neville has historically been played by white guys: Vincent Price (Last Man on Earth) and Charlton Heston (Omega Man). Maybe it’s the fact that as I’m white and reading a book by a white guy (Richard Matheson, in this case) I tend to make the main character match my race. I’m not completely certain that Neville’s race is ever brought up, but he always struck me as being a white guy. However, we come back to the problem of realism in cinema, what the hell does it matter in a vampire movie what race the hero is?

Maybe I only noticed this because they pick Will Smith to play the white guys. If it had been some random black guy I might have paused, especially over Jim West, and thought it odd. But since Will Smith is a fairly good actor that brings his own style to things I was a little confused by him being in these roles. I like what he did with the character of Jim West, he added some nice comic relief, but I really hope he doesn’t feel the need to do that with Legend. It is not a funny book. It should not be a funny movie. Omega Man was enough of a tragedy, but that’s almost certainly because Heston’s terrrible actor, Matheson’s book doesn’t need another bad movie made from it.

Tune in next time when I make a statement that I can actually back up…No, probably not.

I travel a fair amount for my job. Granted I travel to the same places every week, but I’m always looking for a shorter/faster way to get there. My wife says I need to watch out or I’ll end up like that lady in the Stephen King short story. I bought a GPS to help me in this goal. Now, I’ve discovered this might not have been the most effective option.

My GPS unit seems to only really have to settings: Interstates aplenty and “Have you seen Deliverance?” This thing initially wanted me to head south to a large interstate cluster in order to eventually head north. I nixed that pretty much from the beginning. Then I shifted it into the “shortest route” mode. I tell you, short routes must all involve whatever squirrely little back road that was paved on accident, at least, according to my GPS. Have they never heard of Highways? Not the giant eight lane monstrosities or some little dirt track, just good old two to four lanes of blacktop frequented by most people on a daily basis. The best part of the whole trip was hearing the exasparation start to slip into that computer generated voice as they recalculated the trip for the hundredth time as I ignored the directions, yet again.

When it comes to figuring the shortest route somewhere I think a good paper map and someone that lives nearby is probably still your best bet, but when it comes to simply finding somewhere random, the GPS is probably going to be handy. I know it will probably cut down on my calls home asking my wife to look up some map online.

I heard on the news that GPS devices were the hottest sellers on Black Friday this year. It’s good to know that I’m still a trend setter. I’m really just waiting for all of those wacky reports of people driving through buildings or into rivers because their satellite navigation system told them to to escelate in January. Remember folks, between your ears is the most complicated computer processor in the world, don’t override it for a machine that goes “ping”. But if you do, make sure you email us pictures.

Tune in next time when I ponder why it is that Hollywood seems to think Will Smith is white.

Who are you people?

I’ve been a little out of sorts lately, and I’d like to blame the weather or painting, yeah, that’s it painting.

Never knock on Death’s door: ring the bell and run away! Death really hates that!