Drunken Pumpkin

These summarial descriptions, as well as summaries of the outcomes of these conspiracies, can be found at Cracked.com.

#7 - In 1933, group of wealthy businessmen that allegedly included the heads of Chase Bank, GM, Goodyear, Standard Oil, the DuPont family and Senator Prescott Bush tried to recruit Marine Corps Major General Smedley Butler to lead a military coup against President FDR and install a fascist dictatorship in the United States. And yes, we’re talking about the same Prescott Bush who fathered one US President and grandfathered another one.

#6 - Near the end of WWII, things were rapidly going south for Germany and the time seemed ripe for guilt-ridden Nazi officers to assassinate Hitler and overthrow his government. Colonel Henning von Tresckow recruited Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg to join the conspiracy in 1944.
The plot to take out Hitler and then all of his loyal officers was called Operation Valkyrie, based on the belief that no plan can fail if it has a cool enough name.
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Contact your lawmakers and demand that they pass legislation now requiring schools in your state to teach alternative theories in science classes, or find more information and show your support at reDiscovery.com

This study paper analyses the extent to which clandestine organizations embedded in the military and intelligence branches of government have been infiltrated by different ET factions, and the threat this poses to the sovereignty of humanity. The study begins by describing the dynamics of the interactions between clandestine organizations and various ET races. Emphasis will be on describing the different intervention philosophies and activities of ET races, and in identifying how this impacts on the decision making and organizational structure of clandestine organizations embedded within military and intelligence departments of the US and other national governments. The evidence used in framing the analysis provided in this paper is primarily drawn from the testimonies of participants in clandestine government organizations which serve as the strongest evidentiary source for analysis of the ET presence. These individuals participated in ‘black projects’ which have the highest security classifications in the US and other countries, and carry severe penalties for divulging to the general public. The fact that many of these witnesses have been able to make these testimonies public in various lectures, videos, websites or books, suggest that an ‘acclimation program’ is occurring whereby the general public is being prepared for the more disturbing aspects of the ET presence. The recommendations made at the conclusion of this paper are designed to assist in developing an adequate response to the infiltration of clandestine organizations by various ET factions.

The full study report is available here

Note: Even though I found the title to this post funny, I know that it will confuse some. The title should be interpreted as “The Central Intelligence Agency must declare No Diplomatic Exchange with Extra Terrestrials As Soon As Possible.”

“If we did not evolve from apes, then where did we come from?” Human
Devolution is author Michael A. Cremo’s definitive answer to this question.

“We did not evolve up from matter; instead we devolved, or came down, from the realm of pure
consciousness, spirit,” says Cremo. He bases his response on modern science and the world’s
great wisdom traditions, including the Vedic philosophy of ancient India. Cremo proposes that
before we ask the question, “Where did human beings come from? we should first contemplate,
“What is a human being?” Cremo asserts that humans are a combination of matter, mind, and
consciousness (or spirit).

Dr. Hans-Ulrich Niemitz took 5 years to determine that 297 years of what is commonly believed to be world history never happened.

Phantom time hypothesis is a theory developed by Heribert Illig which suggests that the Early Middle Ages (614-911 AD) never occurred, meaning that all artifacts attributed to this time period were from other times, and all historical figures were outright fabrications.

The purported discrepancy occurs because of the institution of the Gregorian Calendar, which we commonly use today, by Pope Gregory XIII in, according to the Gregorian Calendar, 1582 AD, to supplant the Julian Calendar, originally instituted by Julius Caesar, introduced in, according to the Gregorian Calendar, 45 BC.

A simplified summation of the Phantom Time Hypothesis can be found at DamnInteresting.com

More than 60 years after Prescott Bush came briefly under scrutiny at the time of a faraway war, his grandson is facing a different kind of scrutiny but one underpinned by the same perception that, for some people, war can be a profitable business.

Full story can be found here.

Known by the ancients as “deerbunnies”, it wasn’t until the early 1960’s that the modern more fearsome name of “jackalope” was adopted.

Excerpt from an interview with former Area 51 employee - “Jackalopes were practically extinct in the 1950’s, but government radiation experiments on jack rabbits at area 51 caused them to grow antlers and become mean. They tried to shut down the project and wipe out all the jackalopes they’d created, but they couldn’t do it. Darn ‘lopes just kept multiplying!”

Abraham Lincoln: Elected to Congress in 1846.
John F. Kennedy: Elected to Congress in 1946.

Abraham Lincoln: Elected President in 1860.
John F. Kennedy: Elected President in 1960.

The names Lincoln and Kennedy each contain seven letters.

Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.

Both had wives who lost their children while living in the White House.

Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.

Both were shot in the head.

Lincoln’s secretary, Kennedy, warned him not to go to the theatre.
Kennedy’s secretary, Lincoln, warned him not to go to Dallas.

Both Lincoln and Kennedy were assassinated by Southerners.

Both were succeeded by Southerners.

Both successors were named Johnson.

Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.

John Wilkes Booth was born in 1839.
Lee Harvey Oswald was born in 1939.

Both assassins were known by their three names.

Both assassins names contain 15 letters.

Booth ran from the theater and was caught in a warehouse.
Oswald ran from a warehouse and was caught in a theater.

Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.

Ever want a nice clean breakdown of the theories centering around the Illuminati? Of course you have!!
The7thFire.com gives a fairly expansive breakdown of numerous proofs of the existence of a secret society known only as the Order of the Illuminati. Click the picture below to check it out.

Excerpt from an article by Aaron Sakulich, the entirety of which can be found here.

Apparently, to all of the kooks and nutjobs in the world, this means “New York City: Killing Jews is okay.” This font has been the subject of rumor and conspiracy theory since around 1992, when a number of newspapers discovered this diabolical code.

Since it was, apparently, the slowest news day in the history of mankind, articles began appearing about the anti-Semitic codes hidden in Microsoft’s software. It got so much press that the people who created the font had to take time out from their busy day to defend themselves. My understanding is that they’re nice people, don’t even remotely hate Jews and claim that this whole NYC business is a coincidence.

But is it? There are 255 characters in the Wingdings font. If you’re going to have these three characters in that set, what are the chances that they will appear in this order? Well, according to the chapter in a statistics book that I read in the twenty minutes between writing that last sentence and this one, the odds are one in 16,581,375.

Odds are actually 1:16,386,810, but not much difference.